Captain Marvel vol. 5 #2Captain Marvel vol. 5 #2
Title: “Does A Hulk Sit in the Woods?"
Writer: Peter David
Penciller: Chriscross
Inker: Anibal Rodriguez with Faucher and Koblish
Colors: Steve Oliff
Editor: Tom Brevoort
Lorraine is holding the camera as Marlo walks around in the woods. Marlo is hamming it up for the camera, but doesn’t watch where she is going and falls into the water. Marlo tells Lorraine to turn the camera around so she can dry off. Lorraine points the camera at herself and says that she, a Julliard graduate, has agreed to be in this stupid “mockumentary” because she is desperate for an acting gig. Lorraine says that her co-star is Marlo. She turns the camera on Marlo who has her top off with her back to the camera. Lorraine says that Marlo gets to be in the movie because she is built like a brick outhouse but has no acting ability. Lorraine calls out to Marlo. Marlo turns around and screams when she sees the camera on her. She throws her sweater over the camera and Marlo and Lorraine tell each other that they hate each other.
Captain Marvel is about to dive down on some armed men as they run out of Golden Orange Comics. Rick tells him to wait and to close his eyes. Marv notices that nobody is screaming at the gunfire. Rick says that is because it isn’t happening. Marv has a hunch and flies back up. Rick says that Marlo works in that store and he wanted to see her. Marv says that he will but he just wants to check something. He spots the same men that he thought he spotted earlier in their getaway car. Marv dives right into the car’s engine. The guys inside try to run, but he knocks them down. The police arrive and tell Captain Marvel to freeze unless he has a good reason for doing this. Marv blows the hood off the truck to reveal lots of guns and cash. One of the crooks says, “A-ha! But it’s an illegal search and seizure! You had no reason to stop us, hero!” Marv replies, “A-ha! But I’m not a police officer, bound by your laws.” Marv flies off as the police take the crooks into custody.
Back in the Canadian woods, Marlo is yelling at Lorraine and asks her why she keeps letting her get into trouble. Lorraine says that she is just watching her butt and Marlo can watch her own. Marlo asks why she is being so nasty, but Lorraine says that she is being the picture of sweetness and light. Lorenzo shows up and tells them that it is getting dark and that they should pitch their tent. Marlo and Lorraine both think that this isn’t going to work. Larry says that it is working great and that the building tension between them will have them on edge. He says that soon they will believe that there really are monsters in the bushes. In a nearby bush a set of eyes from a monster watches the trio.
Inside Golden Orange Comics, Rick Jones laughs out loud at the Hulk: Chapter One annual he is reading. Al starts saying that this isn’t a library, but then he realizes that it’s Rick. Rick asks where Marlo is. Al says that she took a few days off to go into the Canadian Woods to make a movie about monsters. Rick runs out of the building. Outside Marv asks Rick what the problem is. Rick says that he just knows that Marlo is going to run into the Wendigo up there and that they have to save her. A mugger comes up behind Rick as he is about to transform and tells him to give him the bracelets. Rick bangs the nega-bands and the explosion from the change scorches the mugger. Genis tells the mugger to go turn himself in to the police as he flies away. Marv says that Canada is a big place and thinks it would be a pretty strange coincidence if she ran into one specific person. Rick says that they live in a strange world.
Back in the woods, Marlo is filming Lorraine
and asks her again why she is being so mean. Lorraine says that
she has gone out on hundreds of auditions, but that all the good
parts are grabbed up by people like Marlo: tall, good-looking,
boffable types who can’t act. Lorraine says that she is sick
of being yanked around. Suddenly the tent is knocked over.
Lorraine and Marlo struggle until the tent is ripped open and
they are left looking up at the giant silhouette of a monster.
Captain Marvel arrives and blasts the giant figure. Marlo shouts
for Marv not to hurt him. Marv asks who it is, but before he is
answered a giant green fist smacks him through a tree. 
Cap gives Hulk
a blast twice as strong as his last one, but Hulk says that he is
three times angrier than he was. Hulk punches Marv and Marv is
skipped across the water like a flat rock and into a tree. Genis
suggests that they switch and the Hulk will stop when he sees
Rick. Rick says that he can’t let Marlo find out about them
like that. Rick says that this is just a mis-understanding, and
that if they stop attacking Hulk the fight will end. Suddenly
there is a scream.
Lorraine has run off. She says that she has to quit smoking as she struggles to catch her breath. Suddenly Larry appears. Lorraine says that the Hulk is back there, and that she ran off and left Marlo there. Lorraine says that they have to go back to help her. She says that Marlo is a ditz, but that nobody deserves to have monsters coming after them in the end. Larry takes out a knife and cuts Lorraine’s throat. He says that in the end they all get what they deserve. Larry licks the blood off his knife.
Moondragon uses her telekinesis to open Rick Jones’ deadbolts and walks into his apartment. The landlord comes over and asks Moondragon if she knows where Rick is, and that he is late with the rent. Moondragon says that Rick isn’t late and that the landlord lets him live there rent free.
Marlo tells Bruce to calm down. Marlo screams as Hulk winds up for a punch, but Hulk suddenly remembers Marlo. Marlo says that Hulk is looking buff and asks if he has been working out. Hulk cracks a smile. Captain Marvel smashes right into Hulk’s back and drives him into the water. Rick tells Marv to let Hulk think that he is drowning him. Marv says that he is drowning him. Rick says that Marv can survive in space, but Marv points out that his powers protect him where there is no oxygen, but that there is oxygen in water it just isn’t breathable. Marv bangs the nega-bands and the changing explosion blows Hulk off him. Hulk looks and sees Rick. Hulk asks how this happened. Rick says that it involves the Avengers and that it takes forever to tell.
Suddenly the Wendigo pops out of the water and grabs Rick. Marv asks Rick what is happening. The Wendigo is about to take a bite out of Rick as Rick says that he hates being right all the time.
Legacy rating: 8 out of 10
The most confusing thing about this issue is that it came out before Incredible Hulk vol. 3 #12 and many were astonished to see an intelligent Hulk appear out of nowhere. Tom Brevoort knew what was coming up and allowed Peter to write any Hulk that he wanted. I really like the way the story ties together. Lorenzo is right about Marlo and Lorraine’s dynamic as they work very well together. But really this is Captain Marvel, Rick Jones, Peter David Hulk, and the Wendigo. What more could you ask for? Well something because I give it a 4.5 out of 5
Again Chrisscross’ facial expression are classic, but his lack of fluid storytelling is really a distraction. Hulk and Captain Marvel have a fight, and there isn’t even one notable fight picture. Still the faces make up for it a little more than last issue and I give it a 3.5 out of 5.