Thor #385

Title: “Be Thou God or Monster!"

Plotter: Jim Shooter

Scripter: Stan Lee

Penciller: Erik Larsen

Inker: Vince Colletta

Colors: Paul Becton

Editor: Ralph Macchio

The Hulk sleeps in a forest after having destroyed half of it. Some people walk around looking at the devastation. They know it wasn't an earthquake, fire, or force of nature and wonder what it could have been. One man guesses correctly that it was the Hulk. The Hulk wakes on hearing his name. The people turn to see what the noise is, but the Hulk smashes the ground and sends them flying. The people cower and say that they haven't done anything to the Hulk. Hulk says that he needs no excuses. Hulk raises his fist and strikes.

In New York, Thor warns a group of bank robbers. They don't listen and Thor tosses his hammer at them. Thor says that he is wasting his prowess. A cop tells Thor that if he is looking for action that he just heard a report that the Hulk is west of the Mississippi. He says that he threatened a family of campers and smashed the ground in front of them. He says that they are okay but shaken up. Thor smiles and says that at last there is a foe worthy of his mettle. Thor says that they have fought in the past, but neither was victorious. He says that it will be a triumph to savor. Thor flies off.

Thor arrives to find Hulk smashing Landsdale houses and cars. Hulk says that puny humans all run from him. Thor tells Hulk no. Hulk recognizes the voice and turns to Thor. He says that he is going to smash him like a flea. Hulk says that he is bigger and stronger. He leaps at Thor and says that he will smash him into the ground. Thor hits Hulk with his hammer and says that battles aren't won with words. Hulk hits Thor and says that the longer he fights the stronger he gets. Hulk says that nothing hurts him. Hulk hits Thor again. He goes to hit Thor again, but Thor blocks him with his hammer. Thor hits Hulk in the face with his hammer. He tells Hulk that he has gone too far. He says that he has committed the unpardonable sin of arousing the rage of a god. He hits the Hulk with his hammer and says that now the battle can cease. Hulk shouts no and tosses the street up in a fit of rage. Thor says that he warned Hulk. Hulk says that no one warns him. Hulk lifts a car over his head and tells Thor that his hammer can't save him now. Thor splits the car in two with Mjolnir. Thor says that Mjolnir is no mere hammer. Thor hits Hulk and knocks him on the ground. Hulk's nose is bloody. Hulk says that Thor is nothing. Hulk says that his hammer is strong. Hulk tells Thor to put his hammer down and he will show him. Thor says no and says that he and his hammer are one. Hulk says that Thor is a coward. He says that Thor fears him, but that Hulk fears nothing. Hulk tackles Thor and smashes him into the street. Thor hits Hulk with his hammer and smashes him into the window of a motel. Thor says that Hulk is mad. Thor asks himself if he is not mad as well for savoring the battle.

Thor walks up to the motel and says that he didn't want to hurt Hulk. He says that he will tend to his wounds because he didn't know what he was doing. Hulk kicks the door down coming out of the motel room. Hulk is holding a woman upside down by her feet. He says that now he is in control. Hulk tells Thor to throw away the hammer and he will free the girl. Thor says that Hulk is a bigger monster than he dreamed. The woman begs Thor not to let Hulk hurt him. Thor tells Hulk to release the woman first. Hulk says no and prepares the smash the girl into the sidewalk. Thor sets the hammer on the ground, but Hulk tells him to throw it away. Thor tosses the hammer hard so that it takes a few minutes to get back. Hulk tosses the woman aside and says that he tricked Thor. He says that now he wins because without hammer Thor is nothing. Hulk hits Thor and knocks him into a hardware store.

Thor says that Hulk has given him his chance. He says that if he flees that the Hulk's rage may subside and none will be harmed. Thor says that he can't flee and that he is the son of Odin and the God of Thunder. Hulk leaps into the store and hits Thor. Hulk says that Thor is weak without his hammer. A clerk tells Thor to run and that the Hulk can't be beaten. Thor says that not by mortal man, but that he is of the gods. The hardware store comes down as Thor and Hulk fight. Thor says that no one can call him weak and that he will not shame his birthright.

The people shout to run and say that they are destroying the city. Thor and Hulk brawl into a playground. They tumble into water. Thor kicks Hulk out. Hulk grabs Thor's cape and tosses him into a bus full of school children. Thor manages to swerve so that he only grazes the bus. Thor tells Hulk that is enough, but Hulk isn't listening. He tells Thor to surrender. Thor says that he will never bring shame to Asgard. He hits Hulk. Hulk hits Thor and says that he will shame Thor. Hulk knocks Thor into a store and says that the world will see that he is stronger.

Thor hits Hulk through a wall and onto some train tracks. Thor hears a train and wonders if the tracks were damaged. Hulk hits Thor. He hits Thor again. The train hits Hulk, but Hulk just gets angrier. He grabs the train and throws it on Thor. Hulk says that he wins and that nobody beats him. Thor hits Hulk and knocks him into two overturned oil cars. The cars explode. Thor gets up and says that he didn't mean to kill Hulk. Hulk walks through the flame on fire. He says that Thor is weak and tired, but that Hulk is stronger then ever. Hulk hits Thor and Thor asks if there is no limit to the beast's strength. Hulk hits Thor again and says that now he will finish him. Hulk leaps onto Thor's face. He says that even without his hammer that he can't beat Thor. He asks why. He pounds Thor again and again asking why. Thor leaps out of the hole Hulk beat him into and says that it is because he is the son of Odin. Hulk hits Thor away and tells him to give up. Thor says never. Thor wonders what he has to gain by fighting and thinks about all the damage they have caused. Hulk tells Thor to stay down and that he must win. Just then Mjolnir returns. Thor asks Hulk why he stopped. Hulk says that he isn't afraid of any man, but that Thor is a god. Hulk shouts that he is the strongest and needs no hammer. Thor says that he doesn't either. He throws the hammer away, but Hulk tells him to keep it and that he doesn't care. Hulk says that he only fights when he is angry and that the anger is gone. He says that he will crush him next time. Thor looks upset. He realizes that he is from the gods, but that he turned as savage as the Hulk. He says that he lusted for victory and didn't care about the damage. He asks what difference it makes who is stronger. He says that Hulk ended it while he hungered to continue in the name of empty pride. He says that a god became a monster.

Lightning Crashes rating: 6 out of 10

Review and pictures by The Leader

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