Incredible Hulk #5Incredible Hulk #5
Title: “Beauty and the Beast”
“The Hordes of General Fang!”
Writer: Stan Lee
Penciller: Jack Kirby
Inker: Dick Ayers
Colors: Andy Yunchus
General Ross is in his home showing top secret army films of the Hulk to Bruce Banner, Betty, and, Rick Jones. Ross says that three men risked their lives for this film. Ross shows them where they failed to trap the Hulk with a specially constructed neutron-magnet. Hulk’s strength mangled the magnet. Another scene Hulk’s lifting up a building. The next scene shows Hulk catching and surviving an explosive that is just a little less powerful than an actual atomic device. Ross says that he can’t stop the Hulk through only military means, and he tells Bruce that as the top scientist on his staff that it is his job to think of some ways to conquer the Hulk. Bruce shakes Ross’ hand and says that he and Rick will do their best. Ross says that he doesn’t know why Bruce wants that insolent teenager as an assistant. Betty says that Bruce can choose anyone he wants.
After Bruce and Rick leave, Ross says that he knows how Betty feels about Bruce, but that he still doesn’t entirely trust him. Ross says that he is too closed-mouthed, but Betty says that Bruce has to be because he works on top secret weapons and answers only to the president. Ross says that it still rubs him the wrong way, but that he is a soldier and obeys orders.
Miles below the surface, Tyrannus watches
Betty Ross through a crystal ball looking device. Tyrannus notes
that Betty loves Bruce Banner, and that it is that love that he
will use to help him conquer the surface of the Earth. The
subterranean bows before Tyrannus and asks what is his command.
Tyrannus says that after centuries of waiting and planning that
the time has come for Tyrannus to strike. First Tyrannus goes to
sip from his fountain of youth. Tyrannus drinks and says that
even though he was banished to the center of the Earth centuries
ago by the accursed Merlin the Magician that this elixir has kept
him alive and young allowing him to plan his revenge. Tyrannus
says that Merlin couldn’t have known that he would find an
entire race of beings that would be his slaves. Tyrannus says
that with the subterraneans’ knowledge of science, and their
desire to serve him, they have created the mightiest weapons ever
dreamed of. 
Tyrannus says
that the only thing he fears is the atomic might of America, but
that he is going to use Betty Ross to protect himself from that.
The next day, Bruce Banner and Rick Jones are driving in to Ross’ house. Rick is laughing about Ross ordering Bruce to capture himself. Bruce says that if only mankind would trust the Hulk because then he could reveal the secret. Rick says that he knows Bruce’s secret and even then he says that he still trembles when he sees the Hulk. Bruce and Rick go into Ross’ home, and Betty introduces Mr. Tyrannus, an archeologist. Betty says that she is going to show him the cliff caves nearby. Bruce whispers that he doesn’t like Tyrannus’ looks. Betty says that it is working and hopes to make Bruce jealous and think of her as a woman.
Minutes later, Bruce and Rick are by the cliff caves. He wonders why an archeologist would need a local girl to show him around. Rick says that following cave lovers is for the birds. Bruce also wonders why Tyrannus didn’t have any archeologist equipment with him. Bruce and Rick head down the cave until they come to a giant boulder blocking the way. They can’t move the thing, and yet the footprints lead past it. Bruce tells Rick that they are going to the lab.
On the other side of the boulder, Betty doesn’t understand where the vehicle that Tyrannus is driving her in came from. She realizes that he is no stranger around there. Tyrannus says that not only isn’t he a stranger here, but that this is his kingdom. Tyrannus flips a switch and the little screen on the dashboard show General Ross worrying about Betty. Tyrannus flips another switch and Ross can see and hear images of Tyrannus and Betty. Tyrannus tells Ross that Betty is his prisoner, and that if he wants to see her again that he will not defy him when he attacks the surface world. Betty says that Tyrranus must be mad. Tyrannus says that he was a master of black magic a thousand years before Betty was born.
Rick Jones sits on Hulk’s back as he leaps down the caves. Hulk and Rick reach Tyrannus and Betty just as Tyrannus is carrying Betty aboard another ship. Rick is on Hulk’s back as he grabs the ship. The ship hurtles down the caverns to the center of the Earth. As soon as the ship reaches its destination the Hulk starts to tear it apart. Tyrannus runs out of the ship and turns on the volcanic gas. Hulk can’t see or breathe. Hulk tries digging into the wall to escape the gas, but he passes out. Hulk and Rick wake up in a prison cell. They can talk and hear, but they are too weakened to move. Tyrannus enters the cell and tells Hulk that he will get no rest here. He tells Hulk to get on his feet and calls him a slave. Tyrannus says that the effects of the gas will wear off in a minute, but that Hulk will continue to obey him as long as he has the girl as his prisoner.
They dress Hulk up as a gladiator and give him an asbestos shield and another weapon. Hulk enters the arena and a fire-breathing robot starts spitting fire at Hulk. Hulk uses the shield and decides to try the weapon. Hulk figures out that it is a stun gun, but says that he could do just as good with one of his fists. The robot shoots a fist out and into Hulk’s face. Hulk leaps at the robot, but a ram’s head shoots out of his chest into Hulk’s face. Hulk advances on the robot and with one-punch shatters it into pieces. Hulk goes up to the stands where Tyrannus is watching and starts to tear it apart. Tyrannus tells Hulk to stop or he is going to shoot Betty. Hulk tells him not to, but Tyrannus says that he didn’t intend to he just wanted some time to aim his paralyzer ray at Hulk. Tyrranus shoots and Hulk drops over.
Rick discovers that Tyrannus has forgotten about him as the subterraneans carry the Hulk out. Hulk is put to work. He is dragging a sphinx-like statue on a trailer. Hulk dams the flood all the time doing it for Betty. Hulk is exhausted, but the subterraneans tell Hulk that he has only driven a thousand posts into the ground, and he still has five hundred more to go.
Tyrannus says that he no longer finds the Hulk’s labors amusing and goes to order Hulk’s death. After Tyrannus leaves an armored soldier enters and says that he has been ordered to bring Betty to him. Rick tells Betty to keep screaming to make it look good, but then takes the armor off and shows her that it is him. Rick and Betty rush down to Hulk’s cell. Rick tells Hulk that he has to get up. Hulk says that he can’t take the chance of Betty being harmed. Betty calls in that she is safe and tells Hulk to save himself. The subterraneans arrive, but Hulk plows through the wall and says that he has just been waiting to hear that Betty was safe. The subterraneans run. Hulk, Betty, and Rick start going to escape back to the surface. On his way out, Hulk pushes over the two giant pillars that kept open the exit from Tyrannus’ kingdom. Tyrannus says that he will never reach the surface again and tells the Hulk that he will give him anything. Hulk says that it is too late and the rocks come tumbling down.
Hulk climbs into the ship. Rick tells Hulk that Betty is in a state of shock and doesn’t remember anything that happened. Hulk says that is just his luck, and that she will still fear and hate him. Hulk says that he doesn’t need her, and that all humans should fear him.
Part Two- “The Hordes of General Fang!”
Hulk is leaping
along to exercise so that he doesn’t wind up becoming a
“muscle bound creep”. Ross and his soldiers are waiting
and spot the Hulk. Rick Jones had talked Ross into letting him
hang around so when he sees Hulk he tries to go warn him. Hulk
doesn’t hear Rick, and Ross activates the iceberg rocket.
The foam from the rocket surrounds Hulk and turns into an
iceberg. Hulk drops to the ground trapped. Thunderbolt Ross
hurries to where Hulk landed, but the iceberg melts enough for
Hulk to break out of it just as Ross arrives. Hulk leaps away,
and Rick runs after on their way to the secret lab. Rick gets
there after the Hulk and says that the Hulk must be waiting for
him to activate the machine. Rick enters but Hulk tells him to
stay back. Hulk says that he can work the control buttons beneath
his feet. Hulk says that he hates giving up his power to return
to the dull ordinary form of Bruce Banner. Bruce is left weakened
by the change. Bruce tells Rick that each time he becomes the
Hulk that he is more and more unwilling to return to his normal
self. Bruce says that Rick must never allow him to remain the
Hulk. Rick says that he understands.
In a tiny Asian village in the principality of Llhasa a messenger rides through the streets warning of the coming of General Fang. The messenger reaches the honored High Lama. He gives the High Lama the message that General Fang is coming. High Lama says that he had feared this day would come. He says that their only hope is to appeal to the outside world for help. General Fang’s men move closer and closer. Fang yells at them to hurry, and says that he is eager to strike.
High Lama’s message somehow reaches the radio of Bruce Banner. Bruce says that General Fang is going to plunge the world into war. He says that he only respects brute force. Rick asks Bruce what he is going to do. Bruce says that he isn’t going to do anything. He says that he is helpless, but that the Hulk is not powerless. Hulk goes over to the bookshelf and grabs a book on “Strange Myths and Legends”. Hulk tells Rick to get a couple of seats heading east.
On the flight the Hulk is covered up by a hat, coat, and scarf. Hulk is looking out the window and says that he could leap faster than this tub. The plane hits an air pocket and the stewardess spills coffee on Hulk. Hulk yells at her to watch out with the coffee. The woman screams. Hulk leaps out of the plane with Rick on his back. He says that they can get there faster if he leaps anyway. Hulk leaps from island to island. Hulk lands in Formosa. He is trying to get his bearings, but lands right in front of a group of soldiers. Hulk tells the soldiers that he is on their side, but decides not to waste time on them and uses his lungs to blow the soldiers all over the place. Hulk grabs a rock and leaps away so that the rock will take the bullets and assumingly protect Rick. Hulk leaps through Red China. Red Migs are coming at Hulk. Hulk pushes one Mig into another, and the others make a run for it.
Hulk finally makes it to Llhasa and shows Rick why he wanted the Legends book. Hulk gets dressed up as the abominable snowman. Hulk uproots a tree and jams it into some nearby tanks. Fang’s men spot him and freak that the snowman is after them. Hulk screams and shatters some sensitive electronic listening equipment. Hulk hits the ground and more of Fang’s men fall to the ground. One soldier runs to tell Fang. He says that they must flee from the wrath of the snowman, Fang orders the man shot, and says that he will defeat the snowman like he has everyone. Fang orders that his special projectors and sound equipment be prepared.
Hulk takes off the snowman suit figuring that they’ve all run by now. Suddenly Hulk and Rick spot a giant red dragon. Hulk leaps at the monster, but it turns out just to be a three dimensional illusion. Hulk’s leap carries him right into the middle of Fang’s trap. Hulk is stuck in a electronically charged cage. Hulk is zapped. Fang comes over to see what he has caught and discovers that it is not the snowman, but the Hulk. Fang says that once he leveled Llhasa that he will personally supervise Hulk’s death. Fang orders that the missiles be fired on Llhasa. Rick Jones connects two wires and creates a short circuit knocking out the guard watching the cage. Rick turns off the current running to the cage. Hulk tears the cage apart. Six missiles were fired before Rick could free Hulk. Hulk leaps into the air and catches them. Fang is unaware that his missiles have been stopped and sends in his ground troops. Hulk uses the missiles that he caught to smash into the ground and create a giant chasm before Fang’s men get through. Fang orders his paratroopers to get across. As the paratroopers start to descend, Hulk leaps onto the top of a group of trees. He holds the trees to the ground and then lets them go creating a great wind. The paratroopers and sent flying about in the wind.
Hulk grabs Rick and says that he wants to go finish Fang for good, and prove that nobody messes with the Hulk and gets away with it. Fang is driving away from the Hulk. Hulk puts a boulder on top of a nearby geyser, and the water pressure builds up under the road and breaks through under Fang’s car. Hulk leaps and catches Fang. Hulk then leaps clear across the China Sea and lands in Formosa. Hulk leaves Fang alone and unprotected among his most deadly enemies. Hulk leaps home.
Back in the cave Rick says that they are safe at last. Hulk says that nobody is safe as long as he is around and that he plans on sticking around for a long time.
No Excuses rating: 8 out of 10
Well as an average between the two stories I give the writing a 3.5 and the art a 4.5. Tyrannus is Hulk’s first real villain. We had Toad Men, hypnotists, and a bad guy in disguise, but Tyrannus seems to be the first actual villain of a grand scale. Still no good fights, but at least we can finally point to a Hulk villain. General Fang however dives right back into the morass of lame opposition for Hulk. Last issue Hulk supposedly developed Bruce’s intgelligence and yet there is no demonstation that they are the same person anymore. Hulk keeps telling everyone to fear him, but he goes and saves Llhasa for no apparent reason. I give Kirby a 5 for the Tyrannus story because of the scope of the tale, but the Fang story strains even comic book science. The corny stuff is pretty thick in this issue and like other elements doesn’t seem to exist for any reason.