Incredible Hulk vol. 2 #317

Title: “You’re Probably Wondering Why I Called You Here Today…”

Writer: John Byrne

Penciller: John Byrne

Inker: John Byrne

Background Inker: Keith Williams

Colors: Andy Yunchus

Editor: Dennis O’Neil

Bruce Banner sits in a specially designed wheelchair and addresses those in the room. He says that they are probably wondering why he called them there today. Craig Saunders says that he doesn’t know who he is, but that he has a gift for understatement. Banner says that he supposes introductions are in order. Banner introduces Craig Saunders, JR. United States Army Corps of Engineers, retired. Demolition expert. Banner moves on to Carolyn Parmenter, formerly with New Atlantis research installation. Banner introduces Samuel J. LaRoquette, also known as The Rock, from Argos Industries who has survived almost every harsh and inhuman terrain on the planet. Banner moves on to Armand Martel, former president of the Xeno-Biology Foundation of Japan, and an expert on life forms both real and imagined. Banner introduces Hideko Takata, world renowned expert on geophysical condition and a woman not above taking a risk to prove a point. Finally Banner introduces himself and says that he is the new head of the Hulkbuster Project. Saunders asks if that is the group that used to go out trying to destroy the Hulk. Carolyn says that if he is Bruce Banner that he is the Hulk. LaRoquette says that it has been all over the news that Bruce Banner and the Hulk were separated a few weeks back. Hideko says that she hasn’t heard anything of it and says that she has no desire to involve herself in an elaborate suicide. Banner says that thanks to Doc Samson that he is free of the Hulk. Martel says that now he is leading the project to annihilate him. He says from one extreme to the other. Banner says that may be so, but that if it wasn’t for him that there would be no Hulk. He says that since his exposure to the first gamma bomb that the Hulk has destroyed everything that he has ever held dear, done billions of dollars in property damages and that it must be destroyed. Betty Ross enters and Bruce introduces her to the group. Carolyn sees Betty and asks if it is “like father, like daughter”. Betty says that her father did once head the Hulkbusters, but that she is only there for Bruce. Saunders asks why they are there. Bruce says that he thought that would have been obvious. He says that they are all experts in highly eclectic fields and that they are not afraid to risk personal jeopardy. Bruce says that he has selected them to be his primary assault team for the Hulkbusters. Carolyn says that she isn’t Dan Ackroyd. LaRoquette says that he has to be kidding. Hideko says that it is presumptuous of him. She asks why they should involve themselves in his personal vendetta against the Hulk. Banner says that nothing is holding them there, but points out that each of them is somewhat a “Jonah”. He says that they have all been haunted by bad luck or tragedy. He says that they are all without funding or work. So he tells them that either they work with him or they don’t work at all.

Samson is looking at the devastation and speaks into his recorder. He says that it doesn’t take an expert hunter to track the Hulk. He says that all one has to do is follow the devastation, but that somehow the Hulk has eluded him since their fight with the Avengers. Samson says that he has a chance to bring the Hulk is alone, but that Iron Man’s deadline is rapidly approaching. Suddenly, Diane Bellamy approaches Samson. Samson asks her how she found him. Diane says that she is just following the destruction as Samson is. Samson asks if she alone on foot. Diane says that she got her producers to get her a two seater gyro-copter. Samson asks who rides in the other seat. Diane says that he can. She tells him that before he protests that he gave her an exclusive before. She says that SHIELD killed that, but that now that the Hulk is out that he is free game. She points out that Samson did free the Hulk. Samson tells Diane to save the blackmail. The Hulk emerges from a pile of rocks. Hulk throws a large rock, and Samson has to dive to get Diane out of the way. Samson tells Diane to get back to her copter and that he has to try and take the Hulk out as fast as possible. Samson leaps into Hulk’s face, but Hulk smacks him away. Diane says that no one ever won a Pulitzer by being careful. She gets behind some rocks and starts filming. Samson charges into Hulk and knocks him back. The Hulk punches Samson into the air, but Samson spins and kicks the Hulk in the face. Hulk pounds on each of Samson’s shoulders and drives him into the ground like a spike. Hulk then punches him back and knocks him onto the ground. Finally the Hulk takes a giant boulder and slams it on the trapped Samson.

Carolyn walks into the cafeteria and asks LaRoquette if he has a minute. LaRoquette says that he has a minute, an hour, or a day. He says that none of them seem to be going anywhere. Carolyn says that Banner has really got them. She says that they are free to leave, but John asks where they would go. He says that Banner is right about nobody wanting to hire them anymore. Carolyn says that she thought she was the only one up that creek. LaRoquette says that they all have their secrets. He says that he knows his and that he can guess hers. He asks Carolyn what she wanted to talk about. Carolyn asks what he thinks about the offer to be the new Hulkbusters. She asks if he thinks Banner is nuts. LaRoquette says that he isn’t sure, and that Banner has been through enough to send anyone to “Happy Hollow” forever. Carolyn wonders if him wanting to destroy the Hulk could be part of a paranoid delusion. LaRoquette says that he doesn’t think Banner thinks that the world is out to get him, but that he does think that Banner is scared. He says that Banner has escaped the Hulk before, but that he keeps finding himself back in the same predicament. He says that he thinks he wants to get rid of the Hulk to ensure that he never gets sucked back into him. Carolyn asks what about the five of them. She says that they have all been good at staying alive in dangerous situations, but that going toe to toe with the Hulk might be pushing their luck. LaRoquette says that they have been handed a chance to redeem themselves or a chance to wind up dead. He says that they all have to decide. Carolyn says that is what she figured. She says that no matter what John decides that it is good to see him again. She puts her hand on his.

Diane whispers into her microphone. She says that the battle is over and that Doc Samson has lost. She says that the Hulk is standing over him, most likely a little confused about why his opponent is no longer fighting back. Suddenly the large rock begins to crumble. Samson bursts out of the rock and hits the Hulk. He hits him again and again and again. Diane says that Samson has caught the Hulk off guard, and that if he can keep up this ferocity that the battle is as good as won.

Bruce writes in his diary to help him remember who he is and what he has become. He says that he can hardly believe that he is free and that he almost is afraid to say it because he is fearful that he will awaken to find that it has all been a dream. He says that he owes much to Samson, Dr. Fisher, and She-Hulk and Betty. He says that it is hardest for him to believe that Betty has come back into his life now of all times. Bruce says that he has loved her since they first met at the Desert Base. He says that she was like a flower blooming in the desert. He says that he was so afraid to tell her how he felt and that she might reject him. He wonders what he can do and that there is really no place for her there. He says that they will be in danger of the Hulk and that he can’t expect her to submit to that. He says that without her in his life though his life will become empty and meaningless. He says that there is only one thing to do and asks for the strength to do what he needs to do.

Diane says that the battle has been going on now for six full hours and that neither side shows any signs of tiring. Hulk smacks Samson across the face. He then grabs up the ground and creates a wave of rubble that sweeps up Diane as well. Diane is falling among the rocks. Samson blocks the rocks defending himself. The Hulk leaps away. Samson swats the rocks trapping him away. Samson says that he has to go after the Hulk, but then he hears Diane calling out to him. Samson says that he has to go after the Hulk, but that it would kill Diane. He says that if he saves Diane that it might mean hundreds of lives. Samson says that there is no choice. He leaps in after Diane. Samson digs down until he frees Diane. He asks if she is all right. Diane says that she will be and asks where the Hulk went. Samson says that he leaped away and that he has to get after him. Diane says that she didn’t just eat an acre of desert for nothing. She says that they can cover twice as much territory with the copter. Samson says that is true, but that only one of them will be flying it. Samson taps Diane on the chin and knocks her out. Samson says that he is sorry, but that it will be hard enough stopping the Hulk without taking the time to keep her out of trouble. He says that he will radio her station and tell them where to find her. Samson takes off in the copter. He says that he will do his best to bring it back in one piece. He tells the Hulk that he had better be ready for him because the next time they meet will be the last.

Carolyn, Hideko, LaRoquette, and Martel are all deciding to join up with the new Hulkbusters. Martel says that he has strolled the facility and that it may be even more impressive than the original Gamma Base. Saunders says that the old Gamma Base was destroyed by the U-Foes, and that if they become the new Hulkbusters that there might be some folks out there that might think they are crowding in on their territory. He says that the Hulk has a lot of enemies out there. LaRoquette says that the rest of them are in agreement though. LaRoquette puts his hand out. Each of them, including Saunders, puts their hand in.

Betty asks Bruce what he is doing out of his chair. She says that the doctor warned him. Banner says that he is fine. He says that he just needed to stretch his legs a bit. Betty says that he is still weak from the separation. She says that he needs to take care of himself. Bruce says that he is, but that they have to talk to about something. He says that if they get sidetracked that he may never find the courage to try again. Bruce says that Betty knows how much she has meant to him. He says that he has come to need her in his life, but that he would be decimated if anything ever happened to her. He says that he has to ask her something. Betty tells Bruce not to ask her to leave. She says that she just can’t. Bruce gets down on one knee. He says that he isn’t asking her to leave. He says that he is asking her to marry him.

No Excuses rating: 7 out of 10

Well we meet the new Hulkbusters, including latter favorites of mine Rock and Redeemer… er I mean LaRoquette and Saunders. And there’s a nice Hulk/Samson fight, but really the writing here is nothing spectacular. The art is pretty nice, but I do have a few issues with it. Primarily, Samson digging down a hole to find Diane Bellamy and when he finds her they are instantly on the surface. Production values on the book also wrecked the first two pages of the book. 4 out of 5 for the art.

Review and pictures by The Leader

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