Incredible Hulk vol. 2 #348

Title: “Job Security”

Writer: Peter David

Penciller: Jeff Purves

Inkers: Mike & Val Gustovich

Colors: Petra Scotese

Editor: Bobbie Chase

Fixit smashes over the cart holding his breakfast, including seven steaks, a vat of coffee, and other assorted foods. He shouts that he doesn’t want any stinking breakfast. The server says, “Uh… whatever you say, Mr. Fixit.” He thinks to himself that Fixit isn’t himself. Fixit thinks to himself that he can feel Banner clawing at his mind like nails on a chalkboard. Hulk feels light pouring through his drapes. He says that it hurts. He says that the sun is trying to burn him away and leave Banner in his place. Hulk says that this is the best life he has ever had, and that he won’t let Banner screw it up without a fight.

Anthony Gold says that Creel has seen the fight that went on there and asks if he still thinks he can take Mr. Fixit. He says that the day he can’t take a Vegas leg breaker is the day he packs it in. Gold say that he is counting on Creel and that Berengetti and Fixit have to pay for what they did to him. Creel says that his men got trashed because Gold wanted to be numero uno, but the Berengetti wouldn’t roll over. He says Gold played tough, but that he played tougher. He says that at least he is still standing. Creel says not to whine to him… just pay him. He says that it will cost a million dollars. Gold agrees and thinks to himself that he can always renegotiate later, but as if Creel could read his mind he tells Gold that he gets thick skinned about cheats. He taps his boot against a fire hydrant and turns his skin the same metal. Gold says that he sees why they call him the Absorbing Man and asks why he would want to work for anybody.

Creel thinks about what a waste his life has been. He thinks about how when he got these powers that he would be on easy street, but that he has had nothing but misery. Creel says that the worst day was when he finally beat Thor, but somehow Thor him into sending himself into another dimension. Creel spent weeks there until he realized that time ran both forward and backward. He simply waited until time folded back on itself to the moment when he arrived. Finally he saw the vortex and himself appearing. He absorbed the vortex into himself and even as he arrived he left. He was back on Earth, but Creel only had time to think about the fact that he had nothing, and that he was tired of being beaten. He was tired of revenge, and that he wanted to start putting together a life like the kind he dreamed of with Titania before she was “killed”.

Creel tells Gold that it is none of his business. He says that what he needs to know is if he pays him, he has him. Gold says that he will get all he promised. He says that all he has to do is destroy Berengetti and Fixit. He says that he can start at the Coliseum.

The server reports to Mike Berengetti that Fixit is in a bad mood. Mike says that he will talk to him. Mike bangs on Fixit’s door and says that they need to talk. He says, “Come on, Joe. I’ll just use my key to get in, you know.” Mike opens the doors and sees Fixit standing there. Fixit says that he used his key, but that he still looks lousy from when Gold worked him over. He says that he should have let him kill Gold. Mike says that maybe he should have, but that isn’t the problem. He says that Fixit is the problem and asks why it is so dark there. Fixit slumps on the ground and says that he likes it dark. He asks why Mike keeps calling him “Joe”. Mike says that it is after Mighty Joe Young. He says that he was his favorite big gorilla until he showed up. Mike asks Joe if he remembers the day he found him out by the Yucca Flats. He says that Fixit looked like he went through a mixmaster. He reminds Fixit how he told him to come with him and that he would have the best food, lodgings, women, and clothes. He says that when Fixit asked him what he had to do he said that he had to beat people up sometimes. Hulk says that it sounded great, and that Mike kept him word about everything. He says that he is the only guy that hasn’t betrayed him… yet. Mike says that he never will. As he leaves he tells Fixit to let him know if he is having a problem, and that if he can’t solve his problem that no one can. Fixit thinks to himself that Mike has that right.

Mike picks up his phone. Tony Gold tells Mike that he wants to set up another meeting. Mike says that he is sure he does, but that he has his orders to get out of town and that he suggests he does so. Gold hangs up his phone and says that he knew he would say that. He says that he has already taken steps to make sure he regrets it.

Creel stands outside the Coliseum.

Marlo lies on her bed, and Mona asks her how it went with Fixit. Marlo says that there are no words. Mona says to try some gestures. Marlo says that she is the shy demure type. Her shoulder hurts and says that she has to hit the spa and Jacuzzi. Mona says that she is going to flip if she doesn’t drop the coy act. Marlo asks if she can’t have any privacy. Mona says that she has to listen to her whine about how all the guys are intimidated by her, but now that she gets lucky that she goes mum. She says that is unfair. Marlo asks what she wants to know, Mona says that she wants to know everything. She asks what he is like. Marlo says that he is either part Indian, part black, into weird body makeup, or he has the strangest tan she has ever seen.

Creel walks into the Coliseum. One of the workers tries telling him that he can’t bring the ball and chain in. Creel asks why not. The man says that someone could get hurt. Creel asks if he means like this and smashes his ball and chain into a pillar. A chunk falls on the ground and Creel absorbs it. Creel punches over the rest of the pillar and then starts swinging his ball and chain over his head. Creel sees some hired muscle and asks if either of them is Mr. Fixit. They tell Creel that they don’t need MR. Fixit for every two bit punk. Creel takes their bullets. He smashes his ball into the gaming table and tells them to save Fixit for something really big like if the Hulk hits town. Mike is watching Creel trash the place and says that he hopes Joe is over whatever is bothering him as he presses the button.

Hulk hears the beeper and say that Mike was just there. He says that whatever is happening that it must be in the casino if it is big enough for him to need him. Hulk thinks about the danger of turning back into Banner and how he would be killed.

Creel slams his ball and chain around. They fire the riot gun at Creel, but he just absorbs it. Mike stands on the second floor and tells Creel to get out of his place. Creel says, “Your place, huh? So you’re Berengetti. Got a chain letter for you from Tony Gold. A ball and chain letter.” Fixit stands in the doorway and asks why he doesn’t reroute the message to him. Creel sees Fixit standing in the shadow. He says that he hears that he is pretty tough. He says to take a shot, just for laughs. Hulk is still feeling weak, but his punch sends Creel flying across the room. Creel says that he felt that. He says that he doesn’t care if he is a two-bit local muscle. He says that nobody does that to the Absorbing Man. Fixit hits Creel and asks if he wipes up spills. Creel hits Fixit with his ball and chain and says that he wipes up the floor with clowns like him. Creel hits Fixit and sends him hurtling out of the Coliseum. Creel goes out after him. He sees that his skin is gray and asks what he is. Hulk thinks to himself that if he is going to keep his Fixit cover that he has to get out of there and hope Creel follows. Hulk leaps into the air. Creel says that there is only one monster that can leap like that. He says that if he had known that he would have absorbed his skin. He wonders how he is going to follow him. A thug with a knife draws Creel’s attention. Six guys jump Creel, but he just lays them out, absorbs their strength and leaps, in much smaller leaps, toward Fixit’s trajectory. One of the thugs asks Mr. B where they are going. Mike says that he is guessing the Hoover Dam.

Hulk lands at Hoover Dam. He wonders where Creel was and that he left himself out in the open to make sure he could follow him. He says that he sun is starting to get to him, and that if he wasn’t covered up that it would burn his skin away. He says that he has to keep Banner out. Fixit says that Creel is probably trashing the Coliseum while he stands there. Creel emerges from some rocks behind Hulk. Hulk calls out his name. Creel says that Hulk was just being coy from before and that he recognizes him. Hulk says that he hopes he is flattered. Creel says that he will be splattered. Creel hits Hulk and sends him flying. Creel says that if he never saw another one of the super guys that would have been fine with him. He says that he wanted an easy life, but that if he had to fight one more of “you guys” that he is glad it was Hulk. Creel hits him in the stomach with his ball and chain. Hulk says that he is touched. He lifts a rock over his head and tells Creel that all he ever wanted to be was left alone, but that there was always a jerk like Creel screwing it up. Hulk throws the rock at Creel, but Creel swats it away with his ball and chain and absorbs its properties. Creel says that all he did was turn him into concrete and asks what he is going to do now. Hulk says that he is going to do what he always does to concrete: pulverize it. Creel thinks to himself that he just might do it. He decides that if he can absorb the Hulk’s skin that he would be able to finish this fast, but that Hulk isn’t making it easy. Creel wraps his ball and chain around Hulk’s ankle and pulls him off the ground. Creel jumps on Hulk and puts his hand on his face. Creel absorbs Hulk’s power. His skin turns gray and his muscles grow. Suddenly Creel starts screaming. Hulk realizes that Creel is being burned by the Sun just as he is, but that he isn’t covered up with clothes. Hulk charges into Creel and they start falling over the edge of the cliff. Creel wants to know what he did to him. He says that he has to change. Hulk tells him to become cloth, and that he will tear him apart. He tells him to become human and he will kill him. He tells him that he can stay like him and feel a little of the pain of being the Hulk.

Marlo asks for Mr. Fixit, but is told that he is out.

Hulk lies on the ground next to a generator. He looks around for Creel, but then spots the hole in the generator. He says that he hopes that doesn’t mean what he thinks it means. Creel bursts out of the generator made of electricity. He says that he is going to shot Hulk “what’s watt”. He says that he has been telling him that he is going to die… so that should come as no big shock, but that this will. Creel fills the Hulk with electricity. Hulk’s clothes burn off him. Creel swats Hulk and knocks him over to the wharf. Creel says that he sees him there trying to crawl away. He says, “Not this time. Y’know I almost feel sorry for you. We both wanted the same thing. I just wanted it more. Creel swings his electric ball and chain at Hulk, but Hulk dodges and the electric ball hits the water. Creel is shocked until he is burnt all over. Creel thinks to himself that he can’t move. He absorbs the concrete to give him some time to pull himself together. Down in the shade, Hulk isn’t bothered by the shade. Hulk says that he told Creel that concrete wouldn’t stop him. Hulk hits Creel’s head. Creel says, “Stop! Stop hitting me! Let me think a second! It’s not fair! I was winning! I was ahead!” Hulk says, “Wrong. You had a head.” Hulk punches Creel’s concrete off. The pieces land in the water. Creel keeps coming at Hulk. Hulk wonders what makes Creel go, but then realizes that Creel can’t hear him asking anyway. Hulk says that he warned Creel that he would pulverize him. He says maybe Creel thought he was kidding, but that he doesn’t kid. Hulk breaks Creel’s body into pieces. Hulk says that he will toss the rest of Creel into the water and that he doesn’t want to leave any pieces behind. Hulk says, “Boy… the things I do to keep a job.”

No Excuses rating: 8.5 out of 10

Review and pictures by The Leader

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