Incredible Hulk vol. 2 #388

Title: “Thicker than Water”

Writer: Peter David

Penciller: Dale Keown

Inker: Mark Farmer

Colors: Glynis Oliver

Editor: Bobbie Chase

Mr. Baldone jogs with his two bodyguards watching his back. Mr. Baldone asks if they hear something. One of the bodyguards says that it is some sort of insect buzzing around, and that they won’t kill him. Baldone says that it is nice to know that something in LA isn’t trying to kill him. Speedfreek blazes by almost too fast to see. He comments as if he were playing a football game. As he approaches the bodyguards he unsheathes two swords out of the armor on his forearms. He stabs one of the bodyguards and scores “two for the red team”. Baldone shouts for the other one to stop him and asks what he is paying him for. The bodyguard asks who he is supposed to stop. He says that he can’t even see anyone. Another buzz and Speedfreek takes down the other bodyguard. Ralph Baldone tells him to fight like a man and that he doesn’t scare him. A buzz later, Ralph Baldone thinks to himself that his throat hurts. His head rolls off his shoulders and onto the ground. Speedfreek says that is a touchdown and the game is over. Speedfreek tells himself that he just scratched Ralph Baldone and two of his bodyguards. He asks what he is going to do now. He tells himself that he is going to Disneyland.

A plane lands. Rick Jones gets off holding his bags. A voice says, “Hey! Aren’t you the Hulk’s partner?” Rick sees Jim Wilson and says that he thought Jim was the Hulk’s partner. Jim says that was back when he had taste. Rick asks Jim what he did to his hair. Jim’s hair is in dreadlocks. Jim tells Rick to get with the 90’s. Rick hugs Jim and tells “Mr. Wilson” that he is looking good. Jim says not to call him that and that Mr. Wilson is the Dennis the Menace guy. Jim asks where Bruce is. Rick says that Bruce got held up, but that he will catch up and that he gave him the address. Rick asks what is with the face and asks if he isn’t good enough. Jim says that he is. He tells the “Skrull-basher” to come with him to face some real danger… the LA freeway.

On the freeway, Jim says that he owes Rick for coming out for the benefit. Rick says that he owes Jim for looking after the Hulk all that time he was hung up. He says that he doesn’t forget that. He says that he is a sucker for a concert to help AIDS research. Jim says that maybe he wasn’t clear. He says that it isn’t for research. He says that it is for a clinic that he runs that helps people with AIDS whose families have cut ties with them. He says that it gives them a shot at dying with dignity. Rick asks Jim why he wanted Bruce to come along. Jim says that Rick told him that he was 100% Hulkified now. Jim says that there has been some noise about violence and death threats. He says that he thought it would be handy to have him around in case there was trouble. He says that he wasn’t sure if he should tell him about the death threats and that maybe it would scare him away. Rick says that he isn’t smart enough for that. He says that he has learned from the best, and that he can handle whatever happens. He says that Jim won’t be dying on him. Jim says that it won’t be this year. Rick says that it won’t be anytime soon. Jim says that he wishes he could agree with him, but that he tested HIV positive. Rick says, “Yeah, sure. What’re you telling me you got AIDS?” Jim says that it isn’t full blown yet, but that he does have AIDS.

At the Mount, Ulysses and Hector show Hulk Trans-Sabal. Hector says that this is the country they are in the midst of trying to liberate. Hulk looks at the map and says that it shouldn’t be too hard. He says that it can’t be more than five feet long. Ulysses says that it isn’t funny. He says that this is where the burn victims came from. He says that they thought he would be interested. Hulk says that they have his interest. He says that especially if what they have told him about these appalling conditions being supported by the US government is true. Hector says that it is true. He says that despite the brayings about a new international brotherhood that the US is willing to ignore human rights violations if money and energy interests are involved. Ulysses says that the line dividing enemies and allies gets more blurred every day. He says that it takes people of vision to redraw the line. Hulk says that he wants to see proof of the blurrings firsthand. Ulysses says that he will. Hulk asks when they go in. Ulysses says that it will be a couple of days. Hulk says that is good. He says that he has time to buzz out to LA and visit an old friend.

In LA, Mr. Lang tells Mr. Shappe that he did an excellent job. Mr. Shappe says to call him Speedfreek. Lang starts to compliment Speedfreek’s style, but Speedfreek tells him to stow it. He says that he has an appointment with his man. He says that he needs his money and to just give it to him. Lang says that Speedfreek doesn’t really care about the money… he says that it is what the money can buy. Lang says that he has another job for him… more personal. He says that he thought that his own men could it, but… Speedfreek says that he doesn’t want another stinking job. He says that he needs his money. Lang says that he knows what he needs. Lang reaches into his desk and throws Speedfreek a vial of snap. He says that Speedfreek’s man isn’t the only supplier of snap. He says to consider the snap a bonus. He says that if he is going to ingest it there to pardon him while he turns his back. Lang turns and says that his son is dying at a facility and that at his bedside is the person that gave him the disease that is killing him. Lang says that he wants that person dead. He says that he sent his own men to do it, but that they were thwarted by a super hero type. Lang says that Speedfreek seems to be capable of handling such types. Lang says that he will pay well in money and snap. He asks him what he says. Speedfreek says that he is cooking with gas now. He says that he can handle anything he tosses his way. Lang says that is good.

One of the sick patients at Jim’s hospice extends his hand to meet Rick. Rick hesitates for a moment, but takes the man’s hand. Rick says that he didn’t catch his name. The man says that he didn’t throw it. He say that he is Tyler Lang. Jim introduces Jefferson Wolfe, Tyler’s companion. Bruce notices a resemblance in Jefferson to Bruce Banner. Rick says that he looks like someone he know… knew… know. Jefferson says that he is looking forward to hearing Rick play and asks if he does any Stones. Rick says that he is all request.

In his office, Jim tells Rick that Tyler’s dad is a criminal big shot. He doesn’t appreciate his son’s condition or his son’s companion who is still, ironically, in better shape. He says that he wants Jefferson dead, and that a short time ago, he sent a couple goons to make sure that Jefferson “predeceases” Tyler. Jim says that in a stroke of luck his uncle Sam Wilson was in town. Rick says that he remembers the Falcon. Jim says that Falcon beat the snot out of him. He says that he managed to hang around for a while, but that he got called away on an Avengers’ mission. Jim asks Rick if he is hearing anything he is saying. Rick asks why Jim didn’t tell him about the test coming back positive. Jim says that he did. Rick says that not until they were in the car. He says that he is going to die… no two ways… no reprieve. He asks Jim how he can be so relaxed. He asks if he isn’t mad, and that it isn’t fair. Jim says to tell him about it. He says that he isn’t going to stop living until he stops living. Rick asks if Jim’s girlfriend knows. Jim says that Talia bailed. He says that he doesn’t blame her. Rick says that life stinks. Jim says that it beats the alternative.

In Reno, as Betty comes in. Hulk is walking out. Betty says hello. Bruce says hello back. He says that he stopped by to chat, but that he has to be going. Marlo kisses Hulk on the cheek. She says goodbye to Bruce and says to giver her love to Rick. Hulk leaps away. Betty tells Marlo not to do that again. Marlo asks, “Do what?” Betty tells her not to kiss him like that. Marlo says that it was a peck on the cheek. She says that they weren’t slobbering on each other. Betty tells Marlo to forget her. She says that she had a lousy day with calls coming from reporters. Marlo asks Betty if she wants a beer. Betty says more than life itself. Marlo says that maybe she over-reacted because Bruce really does mean something to her. She says that he is her husband… even if he does give him the creeps. Betty says that Marlo kissing him on the cheek was the most natural thing in the world, but that it seemed unnatural to her. She says that she is going to kick back and not think about ringing phones.

At Betty’s job, Veronica answers the phone. The woman on the other end asks for Betty Banner. Veronica asks if this is a reporter. The woman says that she is the mother of a friend of hers. She asks if she can leave a message. Veronica writes down that Rick Jones’ mother called.

Rick’s band starts to play. Suddenly, Speedfreek crashes through the window, but he also smashes through the parallel wall. Speedfreek says that was so uncool. He says that he has to work on maneuvering indoors. He says that he wishes he hadn’t killed the guy he stole the armor from, and that he might have been able to give him a few tips. Speedfreek zooms up to Rick Jones. He says that he saw Rick’s write-up in “People”. He asks Rick if he can get his autograph. Rick says okay. Speedfreek tells him that Speedfreek has double double E’s. Speedfreek says that this is so cool and thanks Rick. He whips out a picture and says that he is looking for Jefferson Wolfe. Speedfreek says nevermind and that he sees him. Speedfreek says that it just occurred to him that it would be so great to have the last autograph Rick Jones ever gave. Speedfreek tries to stab Rick, but Rick holds up his guitar. Rick knees Speedfreek and says that he can’t believe that he wrecked his ’58 Strat. Speedfreek says that he is sorry and that he only meant to kill him. He says that the guitar just got in the way. As Rick runs he throws an amp at Speedfreek. Speedfreek says that now he made him cut an amp. He says that if he keeps tossing things in his way that whose fault is that. He asks if that is fair. Speedfreek asks Jefferson if he thinks that is fair. Jefferson says, “N-No, sir.” Speedfreek says that he is a man with a good head on his shoulders. He says that it is too bad he has to cut it off. He says that it is just business. Tyler Lang tells Speedfreek to keep away and that he will give him anything. Speedfreek says that what Tyler has to give he can keep. Rick runs at Speedfreek, but Speedfreek swipes his sword. Rick’s hands are cut open. Speedfreek says that is just a flesh wound just to show him that he can carve him up fast or slow. He says that he can think about that while he “slice the fruitcake”. Jim rushes Speedfreek. He says to keep back and that he is warning him. Speedfreek says, “Oh no! Not a warning! Anything but a warning!’ He stabs Jim and knocks him into Jefferson. Speedfreek raises his sword to finish it, but Hulk smashes through the window. Rick shouts for Bruce and Hulk says that it sounds like a Springsteen concert. Speedfreek trips Hulk. He says that he bets that hurt, but that he bets his adamantium-tipped barbs will hurt even more. Speedfreek launches two cables with adamantium spikes at Hulk that stick in his leg. Speedfreek asks Hulk if he has ever been water skiing and asks about “ground skiing”. Speedfreek starts to roll at immense speeds dragging the Hulk behind him. Hulk’s leg heals around the barb. He says that this is going to hurt as he takes hold of the cable. Hulk rips it out. The cable wraps around Hulk’s throat. He goes around and around and then hits Hulk.

Rick looks at the open wounds to his hand and to Jim’s chest. He says that he will go get something to stop the bleeding.

Speedfreek tells Hulk that he can’t dodge him forever. Speedfreek cuts the top of a fire hydrant off and is hit with the water. Hulk punches Speedfreek and sends him flying into the air.

Rick has some cloth to stop the bleeding, but can’t bring himself to stick his bleeding hands into Jim’s infected blood. Hulk asks Rick what he is waiting for. Rick says that he is HIV positive. Hulk says that he has it. He says that with his system that he is immune. Hulk picks up Jim. Rick says that a hospital might give him some trouble. Hulk says that if they give him trouble that he will give them trouble. Hulk leaps out of the hole in the wall. Jefferson tells Tyler that the lunatic is gone, but Tyler’s head is hanging there. Jefferson sees that Tyler is dead and rests his head on Tyler’s.

Mr. Lang stands at Tyler’s grave. Jefferson walks up behind him. He tells Mr. Lang that he knows her rejects the idea that his feelings for Tyler are as genuine as his, but that both of them have lost someone close to them. Mr. Lang says that Tyler was a good boy until he met Jefferson. He says that now he is going to pay. He says that he knew if he waited long enough after the funeral that Jefferson would show. He says that he knows the people that he hired to kill him screwed up, but that he is overseeing it personally this time. He turns to tell his boys to kill him, but he only finds Hulk and Rick standing there. Hulk says that his “boys” aren’t full functioning right now. Rick says that once the cops get the tape of him threatening Jefferson that he won’t be either.

Rick shouts that Jim could have died. He says that Skrulls, Kree, and robots are fine, but he is afraid of a little contaminated blood. Marlo tells him that no one is mad at him but him. Betty asks Bruce how Jim was exposed to AIDS. Hulk asks, “Who cares?” Betty asks if he isn’t curious. Hulk says, “Not really. If he had measles, it wouldn’t matter where he got it. He’s a friend who needed help. You do that for people you care about. That’s why he was there for me when I needed him… and why Rick and I were there for him… and why I’ll always be there for you. No matter what.” Betty looks at Bruce and kisses his cheek. She walks in.

No Excuses rating: 10 out of 10

Review and pictures by The Leader

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