Savage She-Hulk #7
Savage She-Hulk #7
Title: “Richard Rory...WINNER”
Writer: David Anthony Kraft
Art: Mike Vosburg & Chic Stone
Colors: Ben Sean
Editor: Mary Jo Duffy
Richard Rory is walking down the streets of Las Vegas without a nickel to his
name. He finds what looks like a silver dollar in the street, but it's only a
gambling token. So Richard does the only thing he can with it, which is walk
into a casino and stick it into a slot machine. To his surprise, he hits the
jackpot. No coins come rushing out, so Richard at first thinks that his bad luck
has returned with a vengeance. As it happens, he has won the super jackpot and a
check for $50,000 from the casino owner. That owner however, can't afford to pay
the jackpot, so he relies on one of his showgirls to bail him out. She leads him
to the roulette wheel and gets Richard to bet his entire check on 13 black.
Before he can protest, the wheel spins and all bets are locked. The roulette
wheel is rigged, so it appears that Richard is destined to lose his fifty grand.
The casino owner smirks and tells Richard that it takes guts to gamble and he
needs to lose gracefully. But the wheel short-circuits and by an incredible
fluke of luck the ball lands on 13 black. At thirty-to-one odds, Richard wins
one and a half million dollars. The now unemployed showgirl asks Richard for
some help. He offers to buy her a cup of coffee. To the now-ruined casino owner,
Richard tells him that he needs to learn how to lose gracefully.
Soon, Richard is now cruising down the streets of Los Angeles in a chauffeured
limousine. He hears police sirens and thinks the cops are after him. As it
happens, they're chasing the She-Hulk up the street towards Richard. Jennifer is
losing more control of her transformations and she
"hulked out" against her will. But that's the least of her concerns. She is
trying to run away from the police while she has some control of her temper and
is not tempted to take her fury out on the cops. Seeing a trash dumpster parked
on the side of the road, She-Hulk pulls it across the street to form a
roadblock. She then runs into an alley to get away but find it is a dead-end. It
looks as if whether she likes it or not, the She-Hulk will be forced to confront
the police.
However, Richard remembers his experiences in the Florida Everglades with the
creature known as the Man-Thing, and immediately sympathizes with the emerald
fugitive. He tells the police rounding the dumpster that the She-Hulk continued
to run up the street away from the alley. After the cops leave he calls out into
the alley to tell the She-Hulk that it's safe to come out. Nothing happens for
several long moments. Then a petite woman with shortly cropped brown hair and
dressed only in a tattered white blouse steps out of the alley. Richard is
surprised that it isn't the She-Hulk, but the woman says that the green woman
has gone. He introduces himself to her. She says her name is Jennifer Walters.
Jen weakly states the obvious, that she must look like a mess, and doesn't try
to explain how she's in an alley wearing only tatters. Richard accepts her
non-story and offers to drive Jen home. Jen is taken aback when she sees that
Richard's ride is a chauffeured limousine. She turns down his offer since she's
in walking distance of her law office, but tells Richard, to his surprise, that
she would love to see him again. They make date for about six.
But when Richard thinks that his bad luck has changed, fate proves otherwise.
The dumpster that the She-Hulk moved to blockade the street topples over dumping
hundreds of pounds of dirt and rocks on Richard's new limo. A pickpocket then
steals Richard's wallet, a minor tremor hits L.A., and what's left of his limo
is stripped and looted by vandals. Richard manages to get replacement parts for
his car installed, but when he picks up Jen Walters at six his limo is still
visibly wrecked. She's shocked, but Richard explains that with his bad luck this
is to be expected. In the car, he proceeds to tell the story of his life. The
bad luck began the day he was born when the doctor dropped him. Many years
later, Richard befriended the Man-Thing in the Florida Everglades where the two
misfits got in several adventures. Richard was forced to leave Florida after he
tried to help a young girl get out of town, and was convicted of violating the
Mann Act. (Transporting a minor across state lines for immoral purposes.) After
getting out of jail, Richards went to New York where he not only lived in the
worst part of town, but ended up as a hostage. The Defenders eventually rescued
him and dropped him off in Las Vegas were Richard just made his fortune, but he
fully expects to lose it all. Jen is moved by his story, and thinks what he
suffers from is a poor self-image. She shows him the way to get rid of that by
giving him a deep and passionate kiss. The two lovebirds lose track of time
until the chauffeur complains about needing a break. It is then that Richard and
Jen learn that they've talked and kissed the whole night long and it's now early
dawn. They stop by a fast-food joint for an early breakfast of burgers and
coffee. Richard terminates the driver with pay and lets him keep the car.
Richard then decides that he's not cut out for California and that he really
should try to do something with his new fortune to help the one friend he's had
over the years… the Man-Thing. He asks Jennifer to come with him since he will
need a lawyer for what he has in mind. Jen agrees to fly with him to Florida. A
few days later after arriving in Citrusville,
Jen and Richard go to the local bureau of records to discover who owns a parcel
of land that Richards wants. They discover that the land is owned by a
development company registered to a F. A. Schist. The clerk tells them that
Schist disappeared several years ago, and until his whereabouts can be found,
the title can't be cleared. The clerk believes that the devil took Schist since
he was a very mean man.
In the van Jen cheers up Richards by saying that she's sure that they will be
able to find Schist. Richard says he wished he had Jen's self-confidence since
she "doesn't got a worry in the world." Jen sighs inwardly, since Richard does
not know about her troubles with her alter ego. He turns on the radio to listen
to some music when he gets an idea. They go to the radio station where Richard
used to work when he was a jock in
Citrusville. His old boss Mr. Carpenter at first thinks Richard wants to demand
his old job back and that Jen is his sister. When he hears she's Rory's lawyer,
he thinks he wants to sue him. To his shock, Richard buys the station for more
than it's worth. Richard then has the exquisite pleasure of firing Carpenter and
taking over the station. He plans to offer rewards for Schist's whereabouts and
play lots of acid rock. Jen offers to drive out and check out the land that
Richard wants to buy.
After following Richard's instruction, Jen is shocked to discover that the land
Richard wants to buy is unable to be developed swampland. She thinks he's going
to get swindled and decides to go back to warn Richard, but Jennifer spends too
much time admiring the scenery. While she has been gazing in disbelief at the
swamp, an alligator creeps up behind her. Suddenly, the reptile charges at the
lawyer. Jen's heart leaps in her throats and her frightened pulse rate goes
faster and faster....
Meanwhile, back at the radio station a mysterious man in a wheelchair comes to
visit Richard. He claims to be Professor Slaughter and knows what happened to
Schist. But he has been afraid to come forward up to now because he was afraid
nobody would believe his story and he'd be accused of murder...
Back in the swamp, Jen continues to back away from the alligator until the
stress of the life-threatening situation causes her to hulk out. The She-Hulk
grabs the alligator by the jaws and hurls him across the swamp. Unbeknownst to
her, she is watched by two purple men...
Slaughter tells Richard that he and Schist had a scheme to discover the fountain
of youth that Spanish conquistador Ponce de Leon sought in Florida nearly five
centuries ago. Richard thinks it's a crackpot scheme, but Slaughter said they
discovered the remains of perfectly preserved 16th century Spanish soldiers in
the swamp...
She-Hulk passes by the same remains and thinks she is seeing things. In running
away from the alligator, Jen managed to get herself lost. Now as She-Hulk she is
trying to make her way back to the van. But little does she know that by
stumbling on the body she has just settled an argument by the two purple men
watching her. One of them thinks they should share the secret of La Hacienda
with the whole world, and this green stranger is the perfect person who needs
their wisdom because of her unbridled aggression. His brother believes La
Hacienda should remain a secret, but agrees that the She-Hulk should be brought
into La Hacienda to keep her from telling the outside world about their secret.
They
confront She-Hulk and implore her to calm down and come with them for her own
good. Shulkie doesn't care for this idea and warns the ogres that they'll see
how "calm" she can be if they step any closer.
Richard is skeptical of Slaughter's story so far, and he doesn't find it easier
to believe him when Slaughter tells him about the purple ogres...
Back in the swamp, the She-Hulk is easily fighting off the two ogres. When one
of them tells her that she is too tense, hostile, and bad-tempered, she says,
"No, I'm not!" and punches him away. She grabs him by the throat and in
self-defense, the ogre uncorks a phial underneath the She-Hulk's nose. It
contains a dosage of paralyzing gas, but by the time the She-Hulk realizes
something is wrong, it is already too late. She lets go of the ogre and
collapses.
Slaughter has finally explains to Richard why he's been talking about purple
ogres. He and Schist managed to find the legendary fountain of youth, which was
guarded by the purple ogres in a place the called "La Hacienda".....
La Hacienda is exactly where the two purple brothers are carrying the She-Hulk.
They continue to argue over whether it is a good idea to keep the Fountain of
Youth a secret. The She-Hulk can hear them, but is powerless to do anything
about it. Inside the city, they pass other residents of La Hacienda who are not
purple but look like ordinary human beings in 16th Century clothing. They are
not surprised to see the purple men carrying a large green woman through the
streets, and assume that she is going to become a citizen of La Hacienda.
The purple men take She-Hulk inside a lab and put her in a cylindrical tank.
There, she hears why they are disfigured. Centuries ago, they made the mistake
of trying to drink from the Fountain of Youth, which turned them into purple
ogres. But when one bathes in the water, it changes you and grants you the
secret of eternal life. The ogres turn a switch and flood the tank with water.
She-Hulk is helpless to do anything as the water rises above her head....
Site for Sore Eyes rating: 9 out of 10
Leader's Lair rating: 7 out of 10
I think that Eddie is perhaps a little too generous here (though I think that on the whole regarding his reviews of the Savage She-Hulk series). He makes good points about DAK's writing being well done this issue, but I think I'll stay with the 4 out of 5. Chic Stone does improve the look of the art, but I'd only rate it a 3 out of 5 even so.
Review by Eddie Cunningham
Pictures by The Leader