She-Hulk #12

Title: “Some Disassembly Required”

Writer: Dan Slott

Penciller: Paul Pelletier

Inker: Rick Magyar

Colors: Avalon Studios’ Dave Kemp

Editor: Tom Brevoort

Fifteen minutes ago on what was left of the third floor of the Excelsior, Andy and Southpaw get up out of the rubble. Andy’s blackboard asks Southpaw if she is okay. Southpaw says that she is fine, and that if he wants to check on someone that he should check on Ditto. As Andy lifts some rubble off Ditto, a voice asks Southpaw for a little help. Ditto tells Andy that he thought he was done for. Suddenly, Ditto realizes what he has done. He says that Titania was all over him, and that she wanted to know where She-Hulk was. Ditto says that he told her that She-Hulk might be at the office. Andy takes off running to Timely Plaza. Ditto says that he is sorry. He yells at Andy that he will watch over Southpaw, but then realizes that she is already gone.

At Timely Plaza, Titania stands over Jennifer Walters with the giant hunk of rubble over her head. She says that it is time for her to die. Jen shouts, “NO!” Titania asks who said that. She asks what is going on here and wants to know where She-Hulk went. Jennifer Walters, now standing right next to Titania, says that this just got really weird. Samson shouts for Jen to get clear and that he has Titania. Samson hits Titania and knocks her over. Titania hits Samson with a chunk of metal and says that Samson has hidden She-Hulk. Jen gets clear and says that it is like Titania can’t see he at all. Jen suddenly remembers the spell that Wanda put on her so that no one that wishes the She-Hulk harm could recognize her in that form. Jen realizes that if she changes back into the She-Hulk that Titania will kill her. She decides that she needs help. Titania hits Samson again.

Reed talks with Jen on the phone. He says that he assumes that she has talked with Samson. He says that he is sorry about the secret he had to keep from her. He says that he and Samson felt there were issues she needed to work through. Jen starts to tell Reed off, but then says that now isn’t the time. She says that she needs help. Reed says that the Fantastic Four will always be there when she needs them. Jen says that it isn’t that kind of help. She says that she needs heroes, the FF, everybody.

Titania leaps and knocks over Samson. She asks where She-Hulk is and what he has done with her. Samson, on the ground, says that Titania seems to have an unhealthy fixation on She-Hulk. He asks her if she ever considered that her obsession might be sexual. Titania says, “Wha…?” Samson flips Titania over into a wall. He says, “psyche”.

Pug spots Jen and says that he is so glad she is all right that he could kiss her. Jen tells Pug that he can kiss her later. She asks what is going on and if everyone is all right. Holliway says that Mallory Book was seriously injured in the initial assauly. Jen sees Book being loaded into an ambulance. Jen says that it is all her fault, and that if wouldn’t have happened if Titania hadn’t come looking for her. Pug says that she can’t think that way. Jen focuses and says that he is right. She says that the important thing is to fix this. She says that she is going to need Stu’s help. Jen grabs him by the wrist and starts pulling him away. Stu says that he doesn’t know how he could really help, but Jen tells him to trust her and that he has the skills she needs. Jen tells Pug to stay with Book and make sure she is okay. Jen tells Holliway to hold down the fort until they get back. Holliway says that he is a lawyer… not a hero. Jen tells him that she believes in him. She says that the ones with muscles and spandex are on the way.

Elsewhere, Hercules is working with Damage Control repairing the street. One of the guys says that he can’t believe that Hercules is working with them. Hercules says that he has cleaned many a stable in his day. The ground rumbles. Behind Hercules, Spider-Man, Captain America, Yellowjacket, Human Torch, Iron Man, Wasp, and the Fantasticar with Reed, Sue, and Thing arrive. Spider-Man asks if Herc can come out and play. Wasp says that they could really use his help. Torch says that all the cool kids are doing it. Hercules says that he must heed the clarion call. His foreman says that he is counting this as his lunch hour. Hercules thanks him and tears off his Damage Control uniform. The foreman shouts that is coming out of his pay.

Jen and Stu arrive outside of NYC Comics. She tells Stu that Titania has the Infinity Gem of Power, and that their only hope is to find some way to neutralize it. She says that all the long boxes were destroyed with Timely Plaza, and that the Avengers’ files were destroyed with Avengers’ mansion. She says that the only place that has the info they are looking for is a local comic shop. The customers in the store recognize Jennifer Walters. Jen says that there is a big superhuman battle nearby and asks why they haven’t taken off. One of the customers says that no one ever gets hurt in those. The owner says, “Except maybe a beloved character, for added sales… and the rubbernecking factor…” One of the customers tells Stu that he has seen him in the She-Hulk book, and that the continuity of their book sucks. He says that in issue three people could remember the Infinity Gauntlet saga even though everybody got their mind wiped at the end of it. Stu asks if that is so how he remembers it. The customer says that he read it in a comic. Stu says that licensed comics, like this issue of Hulk he is holding, covered the events, and that they saw print before the mind wipe. He says that when people read them that they remember.

Titania stands over Samson. She says that he is stubborn to the end. She tells him to admit that she won. She says, “Hello? Infinity Gem. Infinite power.” Samson says that she has a limited mind though, and that someone will find a way to beat her. Awesome Andy arrives. One of the men says that he can absorb anybody’s super power, and that he can match her strength for strength. Holliway wonders where Southpaw is if Andy is there. Andy’s blackboard says, “You hurt my friends! My home! You are bad! And I will stop you!” Titania hauls back and punches Andy’s head completely off. Titania asks who is next. The other heroes arrive. They attack. Titania calls out to She-Hulk and asks if this is the best she can do… hiding behind her little friends. She says that if the only way to draw her out is to wipe the floor with them that she has no problem with that. Thing says that her problems are just starting because it’s clobberin’ time. 

Holliway stands over Andy and asks if he is okay. Andy’s blackboard says, “help…Dying… scared…” Holliway says that he is sorry, but that he doesn’t know what to do. Holliway calls out to Reed Richards. Reed recognizes Holliway, but says that he is busy at the moment. Holliway says that what Reed has to do is fix this android. He says that he may have been constructed by the Mad Thinker, but that he was built off one of Reed’s original designs. He says that Reed is his best hope for survival. Reed says that he is sorry, but that there are more pressing matters to deal with. He says that his friends and family are in danger and that an android can wait. Holliway says that he can’t wait, and that Reed is the only one who can save him. He says that if Reed leaves the scene of the accident that he will sue him for everything he has… as well as his future earnings. Reed says that he will not be intimidated, and that he is the only one there that can devise a way to stop Titania. Holliway says that he isn’t and that Jen Walters is already on the case. Reed asks why he didn’t say so in the first place. He says that he will need some tools from the Fantasticar. He says that he has the utmost faith in Jennifer. Holliway says that he does as well, and that he is sure she has the situation well in hand.

Back at the comic store, the fans are complaining about the She-Hulk book more. One of them says that in issue #8 that they got the Infinity Gems wrong. One man says that they said the gems were powered by the Power Primordial, but that’s wrong. Jen says that Adam Warlock said that and that he is an authority. The man says that Infinity Gems are powered by a source that predates their universe. He says that the Power Primordial is the force behind the Elders. Stu starts yelling at the fanboys. He says that Jen is just trying to do her job, but that all they want to do is snark at her and pick her apart. One of the fanboy says, “But the continuity…” Stu says that when he was growing up that if the fans found a conflict in continuity that they didn’t trash it or tear it down… he says that they looked at all the pieces and tried to come up with a solution. He says that if someone was clever enough that they might even win one of these. Stu pulls a “No-Prize” out of his pocket and the fanboys stare at it in amazement. He says that they obviously know their stuff and to use their powers for good. The fanboys start to talk about the Elders. They deduce that the Elders are all dedicated to their one thing, that they all wound up with gems, and that the gems they wound up with would be the one that would help them with their one thing. They ask what if that is not an accident. One asks what if the gems are drawn to guys that want them the most, and that the Elders have been wanting things longer and harder than anybody else. Jen kisses Stu on the cheek and says that she just wanted him to know that he is her favorite kind of fan.

Titania slams Hercules into Iron Man and then tosses him away.

Ditto arrives and sees Timely Plaza gone. He sees Andy on the ground. Reed says that the sonic sutures are holding and starts applying a tourniquet. Holliway sees Ditto and asks where Southpaw is if they are all here. Ditto says that she is gone. Holliway says that she can’t be. He says that if she had left the Excelsior that he would know about it. He shows Ditto a tracer and says that he had a homing chip put in her gauntlet without her knowledge. He says that she would have to be a genius, like Richards, to even find it much less deactivate it. Ditto says that he is just telling him what he knows. Ditto says that this is all his fault, and that if only there was something he could do. Jen returns with Stu and says that there is. She says that they have figured out a way to put an end to this. Holliway asks what the plan is. Jen says that they are going to give Titania what she wants.

Titania holds a limp Spider-Man in one hand and a large spike in the other. She says to think that there was a time when she was afraid of him. She says that she is going to enjoy this. “She-Hulk” tells her to stop and says that he isn’t the one she really wants. She says that it has always been about her and Titania not measuring up. She says that Titania has all that power, but that deep down she knows that she is going to lose. Titania says that isn’t true. “She-Hulk” says to take her best shot. Titania smashes She-Hulk with a bunch of rubble. She-Hulk lies on the ground with a pipe sticking out of her chest. She-Hulk lies there dying. Titania shouts, “Yes!” but in her head she thinks that she never pictured it this way. She says that it feels so strange and that it feels like an out of body experience. She says that she finally did it and that she is the best. She says that She-Hulk is less than nothing, but then she realizes and says, “And… that’s it, isn’t it? It’s over. I mean, you’re gone.” “She-Hulk” blows a bubble and starts to turn back into Ditto. Suddenly Titania’s gem floats off her head. Jen says that she will take that. She says that they figure that the gems work for those with one overriding desire, but that Titania just achieved hers. Titania sees Jennifer Walters. Jen asks if she can see her now and says that means that since she is dead that she no longer wishes her harm. She says that on some sick level she thinks that is a good sign for Titania. She says that she on the other hand has a “big ol’ desire” and that it is a petty one. She asks Titania if she wants to guess what it is. Jen hits Titania.

Later, Pug sits by Mallory Book’s bed. The doctor says that she will live, and that he is sorry that they couldn’t do more.

Ditto asks Awesome Andy if Mr. Fantastic said he was going to be fine. He asks Andy if he wants to celebrate. Andy’s blackboard says that he isn’t talking to Ditto. Ditto says that technically Andy has never spoken to him. Andy walks away from Ditto.

Southpaw is riding in a transport car on the railroad. She says that they are going to find her and that it is only a matter of time. She says that she sticks out like a sore thumb. She starts to say that she doesn’t think that she can hide for long, but then the Mad Thinker’s head says that her problem is that she doesn’t think. He says that from now on that he will do the thinking for both of them.

A tiny Titania stands by a giant phone. She says that she only gets one phone call, and that she heard she was good. Titania asks Jen Walters if she will be her lawyer. Jen hangs up on Titania. A voice tells Prisoner #533 to step back behind the glass. Two ants come to Sheppard Titania into line.

Warden Dawber thanks Dr. Pym for coming back stateside to supervise the construction of his experimental prison number two. Pym says that it should be called the “Lang Memorial Penitentiary”. Dawber says “Of course”, but adds that the staff has taken to calling it the Ant Farm. Wasp looks at the prison and says that all the prisoners are so tiny. Two guards, wearing Ant-Man helmets, say that only the most dangerous cons are shrunk down this far. He says that it’s a way to keep their interaction with human guards to a minimum. He says that to do that they have to shrink them small… smaller than insects.

As Jen stuffs her cell phone back in her pocket, Holliway asks if it was anything important. Jen says that it was just a wrong number. Jen looks at the people all gathering around the ruins of Timely Plaza. Holliway says that is just the human condition. He says that it doesn’t matter how much good they do. He says that in the end it is easier to get attention by tearing something down. Jen tells Holden that he can be a buzzkill sometimes. Hercules flexes in his Damage Control suit. He tells Jen not to worry and that in no time he will have a new edifice that rivals Mount Olympus in magnificence there. Jen sighs and says that she would rather they just put it back the way it was. Holden says that they heard the lady. Jen asks if there has been any word on Southpaw. Holden says that there hasn’t been. He asks about the Infinity Gem. Jen says that it is in the Baxter Building. Jen asks how Mallory is. Holden says that she is doing better and asks about Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. Jen says that they are dead. Holden hands Jen something and says that he thought she would like it. He says that it is one of the few things they found intact. Jen looks at her graduation picture. She tells Holden that she thought he should know that she can’t change back into She-Hulk. She says that she has tried, but can’t. She says that Samson says that it is a mental thing and to give it time. Holden says that She-Hulk will be back, and that it will all be back in time. Jen asks if it will be fun again. Holden promises. Jen asks when. Holden says that it will be eight months. Jen says that if he goes back on that promise that she will sue. Holden says that it was a verbal agreement. Jen says that once Marvel makes it into a comic, and they sign off on it, that it will see print. Holden tells Jen that she is very good.

Site for Sore Eyes rating: 10 out of 10

Review and pictures by The Leader

RETURN TO ISSUES PAGE

RETURN TO SITE FOR SORE EYES

RETURN TO LEADER'S LAIR