Thunderbolts #0
Thunderbolts #0
Title: "A Rare Night Off”
Writer: Kurt Busiek
Penciller: Mark Bagely
Inker: Al Milgrom
Colors: Tom Smith
Editor: Tom Brevoort
In the Royalton Hotel in Colorado, Karla
Sofen soaks in a hot bathtub. She says that she is glad she
decided to suggest this. 
She says that
she knows that they will have to find cheaper lodgings soon, but
until then she says that she might not get out of the bathtub at
all.
Outside the bathroom, Erik is checking out the mini-bar. Jolt is rolling around on the bed enjoying the fact that it isn’t a smelly rolled up mattress. Jolt says “no offense” to Songbird’s cabin. Songbird is sitting in front of the television saying that she is going to watch every movie they offer here. Songbird tells Jolt that no offense is taken, and that even though it’s her cabin that Hercules can bust it up anytime he wants.
Abe stands alone at the window looking out. Abe is thinking about prison and says that he never thought that he would be going there voluntarily for an old murder charge. Melissa comes up behind Abe and apologizes. She says that they were so busy clowning around that she didn’t think about how he was feeling. She says that if he has changed his mind that they can still run. Abe says that he wants to do what’s best for the team. Atlas says that he still isn’t so sure about this, but Jolt assures him that this is the right thing to do. Jolt suggests that they all go out for a good dinner, and have one last night out together and not worry about the future. Abe says that sounds good to him. Erik knocks on the bathroom door and tells Karla to put some clothes on. He says that they are going out. Karla is washing her hair and says, “We’re… we’re what?”
Later in the Mountainview Grill of the Royalton, the Bolts are eating a meal together and having a good time. Karla proposes a toast to the delicious meal they are eating since it will be the last of its kind since they can’t rob banks anymore when the kitty gets low. Abe says that as long as it isn’t Erik’s cooking. Erik says that he is one to talk getting squeamish about killing and dressing a rabbit. Erik asks where you grow up to not know about hunting and fishing. Abe says that he lived in Baltimore and Brooklyn, and all he learned how to do was hotwire cars. Karla thinks to herself that she is going to have to decide soon if she is going to stay with the team since she isn’t sure how things will work out as second in command to Hawkeye.
Elsewhere in the restaurant, Clint Barton is meeting with Gayle Rogers. Gayle says that she has never seen Hawkeye without his mask on before. Clint says that masks tend to draw attention in a place like this, and that he will just not use his real name and trust her not to use her camera on his face. Gayle asks Hawkeye why he is taking this chance for the Thunderbolts. Hawkeye reminds her that he used to be a super-villain, and that if the Avengers hadn’t given him a chance that he might still be one today. Gayle says that the Bolts aren’t really in the same position as he was. She says that most of them have been hardened criminals for years. Suddenly the top of the restaurant breaks apart and Hydra drops in looking to kill the Thunderbolts. The Hydra agents are wearing power-vests to help them match up against the Bolts. Hawkeye starts to run to change and tells Gayle to get to safety. Gayle says that she will as soon as the action is over. Gayle picks up her camera.
Moonstone, Atlas, and Jolt rush to fight Hydra while Songbird and MACH-1 rush to get changed. Atlas says that Crimson Cowl must have made god on her promise to tell their enemies where to find them. Hawkeye says that it was stupid to leave his arrow and quiver with the coat check, but he wasn’t expecting trouble. The Hydra leader there, Horst Eisele, punches Atlas in the face with fist-rams. Moonstone spots Horst’s scar and recalls who he is from conversations with Fixer. Jolt is managing to dodge, but she is being boxed in. She is almost in trouble when Songbird and MACH-1 arrive ready to fight. The Bolts hold their own for a little bit, but the Hydra agents start dividing them and keeping them from working as a team. Horst says that it is just like their research told them. He says that without Zemo to lead them that they are easy to overcome. Hawkeye says that Hydra might want to fire their researchers because he is the Thunderbolts’ leader. Hawkeye fires screamer arrows that disorients the Hydra agents. Atlas starts swatting them out of the air. Hawkeye tells them all to pair up and watch each other’s backs. Hawkeye and Jolt pair up. Erik and Moonstone, and Songbird and MACH-1 pair up respectively. Before long Hydra is defeated. Police sirens start to surround the restaurant.
Hawkeye says that this is what he was afraid of. He says that getting attacked by Hydra is part of the job, but that they can’t fight the police. Hawkeye thinks to himself that he can’t let the Bolts get captured. Karla says that they also have longer range problems as well since Hydra isn’t going to stop sending squads after them until they’re dead. Karla whispers a suggestion to Hawkeye. Hawkeye tells Karla to give it a try. He then goes to Gayle and says that if she is willing that they need her to go talk to the police. Hawkeye asks her to point out that if they try to capture them that it will take a while, and the unconscious Hydra group might wake up. He says that if they just let them go that at least they’ll be sure to get the Hydra guys. Gayle says that she’ll give it a try, and says that she needs to go get a real cameraman anyway.
Karla goes over to the Hydra commander and phases her hand into his forehead as Atlas holds him by the neck. She tells him to hold still and it won’t hurt as she absorbs all his knowledge about Hydra. Moonstone says that when he gets a lawyer to send a message to Hydra to back off the Thunderbolts or she is going to tell the Avengers and SHIELD what she now knows about Hydra. The commander says that they aren’t aware of her having any mental powers. He thinks that she is bluffing, but Moonstone asks if he wants to take that chance and makes sure to call him Horst. Horst is stunned that she knows his name. Moonstone tells Horst to be very convincing because his superiors would be very upset if she used what she now knows.
The police agree to the Bolts go, and the team flies off together. Moonstone decides that she is going to stay with the team because Hawkeye is confidant and good in a fight, but he seems pliable and easy to control.
Outside, Gayle Rogers films her report. She says that lead by the Avenger Hawkeye that the Thunderbolts defeated Hydra and kept the property damage to a minimum.
Baron Zemo watches the report from South America. He says that once again the Bolts escape retribution, but that it will just make it all the sweeter when they fall at the hands of Baron Zemo.
Crimson Cowl watches the report and thinks how with Hawkeye leading the Thunderbolts that they will be more formidable than ever, but that it won’t matter if they interfere with the Masters of Evil.
Citizen V watches the report and says that this won’t stop her. She thinks that she adopted this guise to see justice done on Zemo and all those that followed him. She says that if Hawkeye gets in the way that it will be his problem.
The Avengers watch the report. Vision asks Captain America if he thinks this is mind control on Hawkeye. Captain America says that it is possible, and that they are going to have to do something about this soon.
Traitor’s rating: 7 out of 10
A good read for an #0 issue. The story is incorporated into the mainstream title since if you didn’t read this book you would think that Cowl was bluffing about telling the Bolts’ enemies where they were. The art isn’t quite as good as usual. It’s a little crammed in there because of the fewer pages, and I think Hanna works better with Bagely than Milgrom does.